Archive for the ‘Subversive’ Category

Vive la Resistance!

Posted: January 25, 2017 by zenstitcher in Finished Stitches, Subversive
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My “zen break” today included finishing this.

The design is mine, and there were mistakes in the chart that I had to fix on the fly, but overall, I’m happy with how this came out. It’s stiched on 32 count cotton evenweave, with two strands of DMC cotton floss stitched over two threads. 

After it comes out of the soak, it’s going to become the cover for my little bluetooth keyboard. I’ll be wresting our sewing machine into submission (it hates me) (and that’s mutual) to stitch some kind of material around the border, and finishing it with some elastic, I think, to provide a little “grip” around the edges.

Shit. “Rebellion” is abotu two stitches higher than “place is.”  Grrr…. Not fixing it now.

A Woman’s Place

Posted: January 3, 2017 by zenstitcher in Chart, Subversive
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Okay, so I did a thing. I owe the idea and the font for this from one Nicole Iaquinto, of my subversive stitchy-sisters on Facebook. The rest I pretty much worked out on my own using skull sweat and StitchFiddle.com.

BIG IMPORTANT UPDATE: This is where the original idea for this project originated: https://www.etsy.com/listing/487007120/a-womans-place-is-in-the-rebellion-pdf  The stitcher-artists’ name is Jenna Palmieri. I’m so sorry I couldn’t find this info before I did the post, but I’m super-happy to include it now. 🙂

In honor of Carrie Fisher, who is and always Princess Leia and General Organa. And dedicated to all those Princess Generals who are in our lives, every day. ❤

Creative Commons Copyright 2017 -- please credit Alesia Matson and Grimalkin Crossing with the find.

My gift to the fabulous community of cross stitchers for 2017

Clicking on the image should take you to the media page and the full-size PNG.

I also made a PDF available, hopefully, by clicking this link.

It is not awesome, and I apologize for that. I’ll be replacing it with a better version when I get some software that will run on my Ubuntu 14.04 setup.

I have left room for a little customization at the bottom on either side. Light sabers would hella cool, for instance. 🙂

I’ll be stitching up the first model for it here shortly. If you beat me to finishing a version, let me know?

My Fond Farewell to 2016 

Posted: January 1, 2017 by zenstitcher in Finished Stitches, Subversive
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…or something.

This is how I felt about it.

Yeah yeah, good things happened, too. Blow me. We ran out of nasty adjectives for 2016 in September and have been making them up in sheer improvisational rage ever since. I make a practice out of not wishing my life away, and even I’M glad to see that calendar roll over, at long last.

My subversive tribute to 2016 was stitched using The Country English Posture Alphabet of 1782 — holy mother of whatever, click that link if you haven’t read up on this find yet — which, of course, had subvert me please written all over it. I mean that almost literally, because on the little rhymes that were originally published with these dudes were included on the back. Tell me this isn’t a dude just begging for it:


Anyway. GET FUCKED is stitched on ivory 14 count aida cloth using two strands of DMC stranded cotton flosses for the x’s, and one strand for backstitches.I modified the charts with some further subversion by actually giving them skin tones that weren’t paper white. And then, of course, some of the hands underwent surgery to reflect with greater accuracy my complete distaste for the year just past.

Unfortunately, I’ve got a tall stack of things that have to be framed before this can be. I’ll post another pic when that happens, hopefully sometime in a much happier 2017 for all of us.

Subversive Outlets

Posted: December 12, 2016 by zenstitcher in Funny, Subversive
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It’s a day to be officially subversive. See this link for the Women & Allies Nationwide Day of Protest‘s FB page for more information, if you’re curious. I do have to run an errand into town later to pick up free flat rate postage boxes, but I’m resolved to spend no money and do no banking today. It was impossible to arrange for fall-back care for my MiL (that’s going to be a recurring theme, btw) so I could go to a march, but that doesn’t stop me from taking out my subversive impulses on a good cross stitch design.

I found this bit of unintentionally smutty, intentionally hilarious cross stitch memorabilia in storage this weekend. I’m finally passing on the boxes of vintage 80’s charts to someone who is willing to pay postage to have them, and that’s a very good thing. While I was there, I pulled the plastic bin of personal stash I’d been keeping there to bring home, and look what was right near the top: charts for the Country English Posture Alphabet from 1782!

via Grimalkin Crossing

“or, the Alphabet turn’d Posture-master”

It could only have been smuttier had they been naked.

Here’s the introduction and a bit of context from the inside of this oversized, folded-in-quarters chipboard chart:

The woman who had it before me had taken scissors to it and trimmed off the margins except for one, where she 3-hole punched it for binding. And on the back, we learn that there were RHYMES for each letter that were published with the original lithograph. They’re unbelievably bawdy to modern eyes. Here’s one I whipped together last night, just to scratch my itch over it:

via Grimalkin Crossing, pleasing every sex since...?

Swear to gawd, that’s exactly what the rhyme says.

So today, as my act of subversion, I’m putting together such festive sayings as “RESIST” “GET FUCKED” and “GO FUCK YOURSELF” and getting prepared to enjoy some hilarity while I do.

If Pam Neely is still alive and you know her or of her, please convey my utmost regards. This is cracking my shit right up and the possibilities here are practically endless.

NO ALITO

Posted: July 1, 2014 by zenstitcher in Subversive
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I’m still not through fussing about the SCOTUS/Hobby Lobby decision yesterday. Are you?

If not…

Fuck you, Justice Alito. An employer's religious superstitions should NOT trump my rights!

For writing a 5-4 majority SCOTUS opinion on the Hobby Lobby case that was nothing short of criminal.

(Click on the image to see a bigger, downloadable version. I hope.)

If you too would like to exercise your right to STAB STAB STAB (with little needles, not nice sharp knives. Or swords. Alas) your rage into the asshat who wrote the majority opinion for the Hobby Lobby decision, be my guest. Share and reshare freely – just be nice and give credit where it’s due.

And if you stitch this, send me a pic here with the details (fabric, count, floss, etc). As long as you’re cool with it, I’m happy to post it.

More to come.