Subversive Outlets

Posted: December 12, 2016 by zenstitcher in Funny, Subversive
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It’s a day to be officially subversive. See this link for the Women & Allies Nationwide Day of Protest‘s FB page for more information, if you’re curious. I do have to run an errand into town later to pick up free flat rate postage boxes, but I’m resolved to spend no money and do no banking today. It was impossible to arrange for fall-back care for my MiL (that’s going to be a recurring theme, btw) so I could go to a march, but that doesn’t stop me from taking out my subversive impulses on a good cross stitch design.

I found this bit of unintentionally smutty, intentionally hilarious cross stitch memorabilia in storage this weekend. I’m finally passing on the boxes of vintage 80’s charts to someone who is willing to pay postage to have them, and that’s a very good thing. While I was there, I pulled the plastic bin of personal stash I’d been keeping there to bring home, and look what was right near the top: charts for the Country English Posture Alphabet from 1782!

via Grimalkin Crossing

“or, the Alphabet turn’d Posture-master”

It could only have been smuttier had they been naked.

Here’s the introduction and a bit of context from the inside of this oversized, folded-in-quarters chipboard chart:

The woman who had it before me had taken scissors to it and trimmed off the margins except for one, where she 3-hole punched it for binding. And on the back, we learn that there were RHYMES for each letter that were published with the original lithograph. They’re unbelievably bawdy to modern eyes. Here’s one I whipped together last night, just to scratch my itch over it:

via Grimalkin Crossing, pleasing every sex since...?

Swear to gawd, that’s exactly what the rhyme says.

So today, as my act of subversion, I’m putting together such festive sayings as “RESIST” “GET FUCKED” and “GO FUCK YOURSELF” and getting prepared to enjoy some hilarity while I do.

If Pam Neely is still alive and you know her or of her, please convey my utmost regards. This is cracking my shit right up and the possibilities here are practically endless.

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Comments
  1. […] subversive tribute to 2016 was stitched using The Country English Posture Alphabet of 1782 — holy mother of whatever, click that link if you haven’t read up on this find yet […]

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